Where...oh where..has my dear sunshine gone?

I think I have lost my mojo. Once upon a time I used to masterbate 2-4
times a day. At work. At school. At home. In the car. On the
interstate. It didnt matter. Where ever I felt the urge, I made it
happen. I didnt believe it when boys use to tell me "girls get it the
same way we do..yall just dont admit it..." Well...maybe I was just a
late bloomer. Maybe I was just a closet freak and someone turned the
lights on. Who knows.

Recently, I feel like a kid who has lost interest in their Christmas
toys..you know...right around MLK B-day you dont want your toys
anymore and start looking for other shit to get into. That is how I
feel. Dick is just dick to me. Maybe I need to upgrade to a
3-some....I cant lie...the thought of two men and one of me sounds
exciting..but I have too many rules I would want to lay down...(i.e. I
admit I am a lazy lover so we probably wouldnt do much outside of
one in the front of me and one in back...two in back just is too much
like work...) I digress.

I have entertained the thought of me, another chick and a dude...but
then again..I am too lazy. I have broached the situation on more than
one occassion and have been proposition more times than I can
count..but it just seems not to go down. I know it is me holding
things up...but I just am always off kilter when it is show time.
Either I am too fucked up from drinking and smoking or too fucking
sober and my conscious reminds me how ugly the girl is.

I think I am facing a pretty serious situation.